Are you afraid of being alone? Many people are. The thought that, at some point in time most of us will spend a period of time alone, is something that scares many people a great deal.

People can find themselves alone for a period of time because of a number of circumstances, including but not limited to the death of a spouse, a child moving out, a breakup of a relationship. These are all difficult situations. They are things we can overcome, however. To make life fuller and richer, it is critical to get to where you can enjoy things without needing another person to enjoy it with.

This is hard to accept for many people. We need to be able to enjoy our activities for the activity itself. Too often we depend on other people for our enjoyment. We feel like if we can’t do something with another person, share the experience, we are disappointed. It is like the telling of a story.

Suppose there is no one there to tell the story to. We often think that this makes the story meaningless and hollow. If we think this way it is destructive. We should be able to enjoy our experiences independently as well.

Sharing experiences and stories is positive but should not be required. If you enjoy doing something for yourself, this is the key to independence. This will allow you to fully experience the activity, and feel fully about what you are doing.

When you are able to enjoy things on your own, no one can take this away from you. You will always be able to remember this good time also. This is the key to true independence. You’ll find that you are happier and stronger as a result, regardless of your circumstances.

Sometimes the thought of being comfortable with oneself and happy alone can seem morbid or depressing. Just remember, this doesn’t mean that you can’t share things with others. The goal is that you should not feel that you have to share with someone for there to be value in experiences.

Think of it in terms of both, and not either. We can be fully independent and able to enjoy activities on our own, and this allows us to savor our experiences more fully when we do share them with others.

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